But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
he is literally lying on the floor eating cookies. doing nothing. and as i was hitting him he needed to protect the cookies more than himself.
Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
in light of our recent drunken behavior, i think it's time we seriously consider hiring ourselves a babysitter.
I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean
answered a 6 am booty call this morning...you were still in the er so I thought what the hell
omg. i wish i could describe to you the number of things that were just in my vagina. i feel like i got gangbanged by construction workers.
That's some primal shit right there. My vagina is all like CONSUME HIM AND HIS FRUIT HE WILL GIVE YOU SONS!
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
some how during sex we caught an ENTIRE pillow on fire. A WHOLE PILLOW.
He was Jesus for Halloween and I definitely got on my knees and gave him praise.
Remember that time I came to London for 4 hours, got hammered, cried for an hour and then left.
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
I came twice AND he sent me home with edibles. I think he’s a keeper.
Randomize
