he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
it's official, i know exactly what cross streets we're at by the bumps when i give him road head
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
This has been the most pleasant arrest experience I've ever had.
I was just reelected president of justgotlaidsylvania
i want to pour hot gravy all over you in bed
Has my life seriously led me to day drinking on a Monday the third week of the semester?
It's after 5, it's not day drinking.
I was convinced to buy a man thong.
But it's Armani so it's okay.
God I just out gayed myself.
Running late for a date because I couldn't get my clothes out from under the dude I spent the night with in time to leave when I planned. This is my life.
oh btw ur so lucky i got stoned and passed out or we sooo would have bedazzled your dick while you slept. just sayin.
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
Yeah last night got weird fast. No lie, a kid pulled a butt-plug with a tail out of his ass.
I knocked over his glass and he yelled "Oh no the boxed wine!" and slurped it off the coffee table. Then he showed me how to mix maple syrup, Jameson, and coffee. My family is better than your family.
Just packed vodka and spare underwear into my purse- totally set for watching the hockey with him tonight
Randomize
