What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
So, during a 20 minute shower I spent 19 minutes spinning in circles and 1 minute licking the wall, and it was better than sex. I can't wait to do X again.
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
Sometimes I wonder how different my life would be if I didn't share a weekly margarita with my mom since i was 12
100% truth: never tied someone to a bed using 4 pairs of sweatpants before
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
Explain why there's a meatball in my bong
I need to sanitize my soul.
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
Once he bit me I drew the fucking line.
I'll probably just end up banging you in your parents marital bed,in their honor of course.
dude wtf why are there forks in my wall
does "I AM MAGNETOOOO" ring any bells, because that was you for an entire hour last night
I wasn't going to drink tonight, but was reminded this is the anniversary of prohibition being repealed. If I don't, then I am against my profession of bartending and anti-American, right?
Randomize
