jusi got death stares at taco bell because I asked if Denise was working.
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
btw im making up a story about these stitches..... i think a hockey stick to the face sounds better then i fell up the stairs
I have reached the point in my life where I realized this is what I'm going to do for the rest of my life. Eat, shit , bar, drink, drank, drunk.
And then you proceeded to sneak behind thee bar and hold up an empty bottle of vodka and scream LOOK WHO THE BARTENDER IS NOW BITCH!
How can I not totally like a guy that told me my boobs were too big for me to be taught how to play golf?
This is going to ruin my future wedding planner career, but isn't it better the groom knows he's gay BEFORE he gets married?
'go have sex with her' ddoes not count as wingman
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
I said his dick tasted like a Hawaiian Sweet Roll. And then I yelled MAHALO.
Let's be honest, I've seen a decent amount of dicks in my life and very few of them have been worth all the trouble.
Every text my dad sends me is an AA mantra. Might be time to take a look at my life.
I’m on my third beer doing poppers in the shower to no doubt
I've realized that drinking at your apartment alone on a Tuesday probably isn't a good thing.
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
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