She looked like her face caught fire, and someone put it out with a screwdriver.
So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
Hairspray is covering 85% of my body. Help.
Wait until you see the roof.
Nothing ruins a good sext like too many emoticons
I was so high that i was talking shit about a girl I was with via text, and I handed the phone to her so she could type the shit I was trying to say.
After he convinced me that my friend had died and come back to life, I decided I was having sex with him that night, and that I should lay off the drugs for a while.
I can't figure out how to get this beer bong in my carry on without airport security questioning me as it goes through the x-ray.
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
So the stripper who poured a beer on my head also gives great head. Even she doesn't know why she went home with me. No more mystery shot challenges.
the mexican frat downstairs started singing this mariachi song, then out of nowhere some dude busts out a trumpet and plays along. is this even real?
My gynecologist got a full view of the obviously bite marked shaped bruises on my thighs. I just kept talking about work and hoped she wouldn't judge me.
Apparently I was directing traffic outside of Keeneland. Apparently I'm not a police officer. Who knew....
Randomize
