Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
They both told everyone they fell in a mud puddle
Oh they definetly fell in the mud, repeatedly, on top of each other
On the bright side I got 500 American Express points paying for the abortion
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
Is everything ok? Last time I missed your call you were being arrested.
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
I'm gonna go to bars and pick up women hopped up on democracy.
I'm remembering the time we thought it was a brilliant idea to put koolaid powder in shots of goldschlager
Just wanted to say, I appreciate your bravery in having read receipts
Not sure if buying Twisted Teas for the alcoholics posted up outside the gas station counts as paying it forward but I am optimistic.
I went to the nurse and she literally told me I was too sexually active and wrote me a prescription for 7 days of pelvic rest...... Hahahhahaha
before i went to bed i wrote myself a note that says 'i feel all swirly'
If the amount of time the owner spent looking at my tits is any indication, I’d say I can probably sleep my way to the top
I bet he’d be surprised by the epic blow job he’d get if he stopped talking about his wife long enough for me to get in the mood
Randomize