You can't hide fat with big sunglasses.
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
i could totally date him if i was just drunk the whole relationship
And then I passed out in my towel and was woken up by my roommate introducing me to her trick for the night.
Everything's a blur with pockets full of jello
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
We love you just as you are but we might love you more if we didn't have to post bail so often...
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
just gonna show up naked this time. that way i dont have to worry about finding my clothes tomorrow
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
It happened again.
What?
I lost in a drinking contest with my 84 year old grandmother. Two years in a row now.
i just found my fake in the snow. LIFE IS AWESOME
One of your 'guests' left her bra in the kitchen.
Dude, does it look like any of the women I bring home wear bras?
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
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