Well apparently he's into motor boating.
porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
I'm going to community service drunk, and I'm still going to be the most normal person there.
He's telling everyone that the only reason he's at this party is to hook up with me. SOS HELP.
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
Yes. We drank 3/4 of a handle of vodka, fried and ate a 3lb package of bacon, I tackled the neighbors snowman, made snow angels in our underwear, and then fucked all night. Christmas success.
FYI your bra is now hanging in the hallway as a trophy.
He asked if I could ever take him seriously, I told him I just like his doggy style.....needless to say I snuck out after an awkward cuddle session... I wont be calling him at 2 am anymore.
I remember climbing onto your table and singing"tequila tequila" into your candlesticks. I apologize.
He was like 120 lbs and 20 of that was penis
We are no longer allowed to make spur of the moment decisions about our love lives
ABSOLUTELY NOT
I blacked out. Broke into their house. Took a shit, and left. This is why you can't leave me unattended.
We peed on a building I think...like a building in downtown...not out of view of anyone.
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
Randomize
