Do you still have your period?
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
The neighbors are smoking hash and doing Julia Child impressions...again.
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
my hip hurts so fuckin bad. and I just found a half eaten burrito in my nightstand drawer.
It was either the harsh truths I was divulging or the liquor..... But either way, I made mom puke
Also. This Ativan makes me feel fearless. I think we need an exciting new hobby for when we take it. How do you feel about ghost hunting?
Was behind a guy going 20 for 4 miles I'll be there as soon as the universe quits fucking me
Got dumped. Now accepting nominations for my extra Dave Mathews ticket. No xboyfriends. Must cast final votes by Monday. Good luck everyone
I'm pretty sure that the bartender arranged a marriage for me last night. Sounds like a legit birthday present to me.
I fell out of the car while it was moving then got puked on then puked and cried about then got back in the car and puked out the window when we started moving again
He went three whole days without making a star wars reference, of course he got sex
Puked up breakfast after doing my first minze shot in a while, but that shot was to Trump losing the election, so it's all good.
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