I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
I wish I only lived at night.
I went to moterboat her and I started laughing, so I just kinda blew on them... I think I'm gona call that move the sailboat.
my clit piercing makes the metal detector go off
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
she asked how her costume looked and all i could say was bars are dark right?
I'll have my hookups make my March Madness picks. Win my bracket, win my heart. That's how it works right?
I looked the guy across the room straight in the eyes and said, "If you were any closer to me, we'd be making out right now."
I apologized for the whole SWAT team incident to the roommate.
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
Lindsey Lohan and I have slept with the same amount of people. The only thing she's now beating me on is rehab trips and teen choice awards, so really I'm the winner.
Last night I got drunk on margaritas at an Irish pub and came home with only one shoe. I have to get my shit together.
You really know how to show Monday who's boss.
fries before guys. food before dudes. shakes before dates. chips before dicks. lemon bars before football stars. macaroni before screwin' tony. what i'm saying is please come to ladies' night
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
Randomize
