This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
I just want you to know that were having pizza delivered to the emergency room
As we were fooling around he told me he was conceived on this bed like it would turn me on.
All I got from that conversation with the officer was "blah blah blah, you're disgusting, blah blah blah, $500 fine, blah blah blah, be in court Tuesday."
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
Can you work for me at 4? We might have just taken some drugs we found in the couch and... end of story
And that kids is the last time I ever try to outdrink Germans
I'm only coming over if you have cocaine or a snickers bar
DO I FUCKING *LOOK* LIKE SOMEONE WHO HAS THEIR ACT TOGETHER!?!? THE ANSWER IS "NO"!
I was playing 'If You Had To Fuck One or Die' with the old composite pictures with a guy in the bathroom line. They were all pretty ugly so I go "You can tell this is a lower tier frat"......turns out the guy was a brother
Kids I used to babysit are now fuckable members of my social media periphery.. Getting old sucks
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