Come 10 years my vagina won't look like this. I must cherish it
She posts like 3 statuses a day pleading for pity. Responding positively would be like giving a dog a treat for shitting on the floor.
Valium party in the driveway. Attendance: 1. Don't make me do this alone.
At least he's not married... I hate Halloween hookups
On the bright side, nobody died. Please bring me back my left shoe. I have work in an hour.
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
If youre wondering about the smell, i set your hamster on fire. But don't worry he's ok
I look like a bag of dicks so if you could ugly yourself up that'd be great.
I woke up to the sound of him repeatedly tapping out SOS in Morse Code using his hard cock.
She pulled me up to my feet by my hair. I thought it was you for a second. My drunken angel savior.
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
but I have boobs. I'm not going to buy my own drinks at the bar like some kind of fucking animal.
He has a burner phone just to send dick pics. It's revolutionary
Pandora was on point with the sex music tonight
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