loyola was giving a tour this morning and they all saw me in a half ripped off toga throwing up over the side of the dorm stairs
you don't even go to loyola anymore
I told him I was pregnant. Figured it would soften the blow of telling him I had herpes.
Did it?
Not as such, no.
She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
Hate sex is AWESOME! I faked it, and when she fell asleep i came in her purse.
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
I wish I had a frozen water bed.
best. idea. ever.
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms
He turned down jacuzzi sex. He cares more about my vagina than i do.
I've been up for almost three hours and it took me until JUST NOW to figure out that what I'm tasting isn't blood, just the minerals in the water. Fuck hangovers, man.
I'll give you some choices for what to get me for Christmas. 1.You naked. 2.You naked 3.You naked.
The struggle bus crashed, rolled down a mountain, and went on fire, and I was on it ugh.
Yeah I'm just gonna shower and drink a gallon of coffee and drunkenly write my research paper. It'll be fine
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
We only initially bonded over boobs and sarcasm
Randomize
