That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
I think I have a pornographic memory.
Don't you mean photographic?
No.
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
OMG MY MOM JUST ASKED IF I WAS GETTING PAP SMEAR TOMORROW VERY LOUDLY WHILE WE ARE STANDING IN A VERY PUBLIC LINE.
Barsexuality is the new black.
Don't pass out before midnight like you did last year. See how much your year sucked
I wish I could go back in time 3 years and tell my freshman self how easy it is to hook up with freshmen
Wtf just happened. Thought you were in my bed since 3am, turned out I was sharing it w/a drunk girl from the 6th floor lounge...
She said she'll drive over, bang, and then head home. It's like ordering a pizza.
He can only pee with the faucet running. It's like I'm dating a fucking toddler.
Our DD has become famous. Strippers are asking to be handcuffed to him.
There arew tilmes ina man's life when christmaas. THerew are times in a man's lfie when drunk texts from a bathrom hyufgirto. So, you know, merry chriastmans.
you can't get cum all over my hair and then tell me you just want to be friends
My parents left me the house for the weekend...you know what that means?!
Harry Potter marathon and no pants.
Randomize
