Is it just me or do I always seem to have cum in my bellybutton?
you kept eating the heads off the gummy bears and screaming 'euthanized!'
i just made my gag reflex go away.
You now know someone who has just successfully talked his way out of being arrested for breaking into the town library at midnight. Ive been home for too long.
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
No one is allowed to go to bed until all bottles are finished, I don't want to feel my face tongiht. Do you understand?
He can only pee with the faucet running. It's like I'm dating a fucking toddler.
I was weirded out when the chunky goth girl and her boyfriend both started eyeing me and wanted to by me a drink.
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
I'm gonna be the best dressed mother fucker to ever get kicked out of that damn bar.
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
No matter how long you've been away, there's nothing quite like pooping at your parents' house
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
Randomize
