Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
We were drinking cognac with TAB. I felt like trailer park royalty.
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
I made popcorn. Partly so the room doesn't smell like sex, and partly to apologize for the things you saw when you walked in...
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
There's a mouse. In the house. By the cans. With some pans. Release the cat. To eat his hat. Sorry about the mess. Of my breakfest.
No but seriously, there's a fucking mouse in the house by the beer cans
This is what my life has come to. Like, I may or may not have just stolen pizza from the guy I just hooked up with's fridge when I left...
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
I woke up with gum stuck to my nipple piercings this morning.. So there's that.
This is worse than naked and afraid. This is drunk and confused.
Yes but I said "let's get a dog" not a drunk human so some rules will be established this evening
His face will be in my vagina later so I'm willing to forgive.
Randomize
