i'm in the sorta mood where i wanna be that crying, drunk girl who will hook up with anyone that tells her she's pretty
Someone shit on the floor
Bad news: I had to be at work at 7:15. Good news: no one had used the bathroom yet so I got to defile a freshly cleaned stall
so i used to love airports for the escalators... now its the bars... then the escalators after the bars
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
He brought Stephanie home from the black light party. Apparently he has night vision beer goggles
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
I have to shower first, I forgot I peed on my feet last night...
In the ER with Chelz, I may have broken her ankle during sex. Lovely.
Oh, cold wet seat on the 48! Are you piss? Are you the sweaty ass leavings of an obese person? Are you the spilled King Cobra from the night before? I do not know! I dare not smell to find out... Pants ruined...
I wonder how many people I can tell that he has one nut before he finds out it's me spreading it.
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
If I hear you use the phrase "silky soft scrotum" one more time I swear to God you'll regret it
We dont have cups... so were doing shots out of bowls like puppies
I just don't understand why we can't have sex in the house. I'll come see you but I'll have to think about the barn thing.
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