didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
And he just showed me his vera bradley wallet...
my sister just canceled her nose job because she thought it would hurt too much
It'll hurt less than being alone
U of I kids don't fist pump to Sweet Caroline. Get me the fuck out of here.
I was gonna make fun of her but that plan kinda stopped once she put my dick in her mouth
You yelled "GET TO DA CHOPPA" and burst through her screen door and disappeared into the night. With the goose.
My near death experience also doubled as my coming out story
they all just nodded
Guess whose mug shot is NOT on the Internet anymore?!?!
Finding out he was uncircumcised by feeling his foreskin in my mouth was NOT ideal. New rule. Lights ALWAYS on.
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
My life has turned into sitting in the driveway listening to Total Eclipse of the Heart while staring at the Blue Moon. Hey, August. Let's be nice. I need help.
She tried deep frying a banana by placing one, unpeeled, into a toaster.
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
Randomize
