shit I'm tired of wearing other peoples clothes to bed
Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
He said my breasts were God's way of making up to him for all the shit he's had to endure in his life.
if any part of your body has ever entered my vagina you are fucking obligated to speak to me if i so desire
You're married and I'm going to make out with a stranger tonight. Isn't that weird? It's like a gap in the time space continium.
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.
i threw up in his garden in front of like five people smoking a joint. they let me have a hit after i was done so it was okay
Come share oat with me in your robe
You've slept with someone mentioned in the NY Times, that officially makes you the most famous person I know.
I didn't know I was invited to an orgy.
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
I remember yelling at him telling him that the strippers were "nice people."
Hate my fucking roommates.... Seriously, who the FUCK peels potatoes in the bathroom sink?!
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