I'll collect that couch/porn sloopy beedge tomorrow just FYI
Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
you really dont want me to drink and drive. you saw what i did to my face and that was only from walking
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
So he ended up throwing a watermelon that he stole from the cafeteria saying "if i cant have it no one can" of the 5th floor.
Just your daily reminder that we're terrible people: the average number of men a woman sleeps with in their lifetime is 4
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
I love being high. The owl outside stopped who-ing and I could swear I just heard someone say, "Okay, that's a wrap!"
How would your parents feel if we installed a sex swing?
Between this new vagisil cleaner and these cranberry vitamins, my vagina feels like a new women.
Yeah bunch of crazy shit... Makes you wonder how anyone found someone before tinder
He said we were going to get fucked up in the woods so here we are
He was referring to me as "Teenage Dream" the whole night
So what your saying is you dont remember trying to hit a golf ball off my chest with a 9 iron?
Randomize
