OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
i woke up naked with 27 half ripped $ bills in my bed from ripping them off the wall of the bar
New plan: we get a little bit drunk and go to 24 hour fitness and be eachothers wing people so we can hit on in shape hot people at a gym instead of drunk idiots at a bar.
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
I feel like I have two modes: Super fuckin high, or super giddy from caffeine. I have learned to accept this.
he just hooked up with some chick in a bedroom upstairs so I just went to sleep in the pantry closet...
i ended up playing naked naked monopoly and hangman with my dealer. i really love my life.
Please don't smoke the bong in the bathroom while you shit. It is not a shitting bong.
Dude. I am seriously trying SO hard not to be amused by Honey Boo Boo. But the fact is, she just got a mani pedi with her gay uncle Poodle, and he got a discount because he only has nine toes, and I am ALL IN.
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
Im quite confident that my struggle with sobriety ended last night sometime after dinner
He had a vasectomy. I think I'm in love.
If you're doing something that makes your best friend lock you in a bathroom you shouldn't be doing it
Im blaming it on six shots of Jack, loneliness and a chemical imbalance. That's the best I can think of...
Randomize
