Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
we need to stop having unprotected sex.
ya i know. we're like the secret life of the american whores.
Last night I walked out of the bar got in a cab asked the cabi to circle the block. he did and brought me right back to the bar. I paid him $7 thanked him and walked back into the bar.
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
He apologized for his naked psychotic episode and then we had goodbye sex on his sailboat
I took 20 bucks from you because when I woke up I saw more of you than I ever wanted to see bro.
Totally acceptable.
I don't want to tell anyone! People who sleep with senators either end up in porn or guantanamo
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
Ways to ruin a one night stand: the guy finds your parenting magazine on your dorm room desk.
Mid stroke she told me she'd had bigger. Replied I could tell. Sex ended right at that moment.
seriously the second he called my tits warlocks was the second I knew I wasn't going to fuck him.
I had to get my boss birth control a work today. I knew going to ASU would come in handy in my career someday.
Who knew that the guy I fucked on your front lawn during welcome week freshman year would turn out to be my husband
Every person I've ever had sex with is in Chipotle right now.
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
Randomize
