Who knew there were guys that wanted to only stalk you instead of date you? Count on me to find them!
I'm totally gay for Miss Californiaaaaaa
oh sweet, sweet irony
JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
Masterbating to gospel music is like god cheering on your orgasm
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
im actually so stoned and hungover i feel like a bag of jello stuffed into a human shape
Like I've never seen her that drunk. She's usually like quiet and doesn't say she'll fuck someone on a futon
Nothing better than going to Mass on Easter Sunday with "I love penis" henna tattooed across your back. Love your Indian culture.
I'm not entirely sure that the guy that just texted me is not on drugs right now. I'm also not entirely sure that he isn't about to be incarcerated.
watched my neighbor eat five yodels, mow his lawn, and then cry on his porch after the party... what did you give him?
He started making out with my boobs. I didn't know whether to be proud of my boobs or ashamed of my mouth.
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
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