You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
I'm at the airport and there's a guy wearing all camoflash to go hunting .. Should I bump in to him and say woahh sorry didn't see you there?
I bruise way too easily for the kind of rough sex I want...
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
I just think that if you're going to run around naked outside, a feather boa should be involved. Half for the flair and half for an emergency cover.
My brother didnt wanna sleep with her because she was my friend. Did I miss the memo where we're not supposed to be fucking each others friends? Oh well too late.
why does CNN give a flying $@*# about the royal baby so, so much?
i hope they name him Joffrey
His status said "sad." of course I liked it. I don't even care that I was the only one. Facebook isn't your god damn journal, we don't care about your problems.
Did he think I was flirting with him when I ordered a hot dog bc no
Blowing lines in the bathroom and trying to get into the mindset of someone who wants to be at work for 12 hours
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
You like that 95% of the time I masterbate I think bout you?
Just wanna know what I can I do to earn the other 5%
she said. She was going to, and I quote, "put her vagina inside my dick".
Randomize
