question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
You know you had a bad blackout when you forget you held the stanley cup.
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
He then proceeded to tell me about his enlarged lymph nodes, his"severe" case of blue balls.
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
fact: I now appreciate my drunken winter self even more. I just found $20 in my winter coat with a note that says keep yourself warm next winter. I am awesome.
His fucking was so lame I considered painting my nails during...
I told my mom about how you got white girl wasted and sobbed about Whitney Houston. She sends her condolences.
tell her thanks so much
Promise me you will not let me do anything sexual with or to a mini horse no matter how drunk we get. Ever.
I'll be home soonish I need 4th of July sex, it's the American thing to do.
You kept whispering to me that the guy making your burrito was an angel.
It's scary that my vibrator is a dangerous weapon. I want a new one.
Randomize
