Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
Her life has all the ingredients for a how to book: Making Your Life an Epic Fail
i woke up to see him pissing on your n64. thats like killing a unicorn. punishable by death for sure.
there was so much ham clogging the tub drain.. he said it was ok he has a cleaning lady
But fine, we can play that game. You can come over and we can have totally platonic, long, boring discussions. Or we can fuck. Whatever.
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
Beer pong consisted of me throwing a ball at the wall and then falling over because moving my arm made me dizzy. I think our team lost.
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
It is very possible that having sex with you just now just got me into Yale
Just fucked up my mustache shaving, gonna have to take it off because now it makes me look like a pedophile
FYI your old mustache made you look like a pedophile
I'm never going out with the ashleys again. it was whoreible. terrifyingly whoreible.
Because that's what you do with poop. You expect the worst.
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
I hate her so much I want to fuck her boyfriend.
I'm not gonna plow a chick in front of her 14 year old brother....
Randomize
