She just asked to stimulate my prostate, man law requires you come pick me up
sometimes in life you just needs hand puppets
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
So squirting runs in the family.
why would you automatically assume i'm high...
you just told me you're eating the powder of a lemonade mix.
If you don't want me in your apartment then lock your door better
Woke up in her bed this morning with a half used condom stuck to the side of my face
How can a condom be "half used"?
Just let me take your liver out and beat it with a meat tenderizer for you..
Sometimes I really think that if... When your stoned you have a catlike ability to just relax in any position
I didn't want to fight, I just wanted to tell you to fuckoff.
I hope the lord has blessed you with many tampons, child.
There's a Japanese guy here dressed as a Viking who just screamed "wats up cocksluts" and kicked a guy in the face. come get me out of here.
Great, now even dream!me is a drunken borderline mess.
I'd rather plunge my eyes out than acknowledge being related to either of my brothers
Randomize
