He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
i just turned the eviction notice into a beer pong list
A guy on the street just growled at me and said damnnnn. Sometimes it scares me how attractive i am.
so, I mean this in the straightest way possible, but don't you ever just feel like you owe Jon Stewart a blowjob...
I just had a flashback of me saying "I'm not ready to be a deadbeat mom" lastnight.
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
Dude I walked 1.4 miles through the hotel wearing a cowboy hat, pink topped boots, gucci shades, and a scarf and met my parents in the hallway at 7 am how is this not a good start to Vegas?
WE'RE FINALLY ADMITTING THAT WE DESPERATELY WANT TO SCREW EACH OTHER. THIS IS WHAT PROGRESS FEELS
You know what, don't even answer. Just promise me you'll go to the Corner of Shame when you get home.
Do you know how hard it is to was the scent of sex from your hair in a gas station bathroom?!
No, he wouldn't have sex with me....but on the brightside I managed to fit the entire falafel sandwhich in my purse!!
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
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