it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
i think im having one of those erections lasting four or more hours
dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
Do you know how hard it is to conceal the fact that you puked all over the bed that someone is sleeping in?
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
The bar I'm at just passed out smores to everyone. I don't know what it has to do with cinco de mayo but I'm down.
My face is tingly. And my legs are being massaged by golden elves.
Haha jealous. If I could remember my dreams I'm pretty sure they would constantly be about being drunk in foreign countries
Even though he was watching you pee on his bedroom floor, you kept denying it and saying he was dreaming
Bad idea to be in a car concussed. I just described his dick as an elevator. I think i meant escalator, i dont know
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
NO TEQUILA
Why do I always think it's a good idea? Like a challenge? Shit maybe I should CHALLEGE myself to get laid for once instead
my biography would be titled "haunting truths and dick jokes: a tale of love, loss, and masturbation."
That was the most spiritually awakened shit I have ever taken.
A cop may or may not have seen my bare ass against the moonlight within the past hour
Randomize
