he thought i was a dude.
yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
I imagine anything that isn't a dilldo attached to a jackhammer, powered by a generator won't be amazing enough for you
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
I couldn't get past the raccoon on my porch so i slept on my lawn.
JUST MADE A FLAMING SLED. MIGHT HAVE 3RD DEGREE BURNS.
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
Last time he went to Europe, every time he started drinking he would wake up in a different country with no memory. There is no way he can be tour leader.
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
And if I don't get arrested for drinking and canoeing over the next 3 days, this hurricane will not have turned out anywhere near as well as I planned
DID YOU DO SOMETHING WITH THE DEAD ROACH IN THE KITCHEN? OR DID IT LAZARUS?
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
Just walked by the neighbors and they are definitely butt naked sitting on a bed, watching Netflix, baked out of their minds, with the blinds open.
Welcome to Bellingham.
Do you think my laundromat will notice that the bloodstain on my sheets is in the shape of a face?
I didn't know it was possible and I don't know if I'll ever be able to do it again on my own but he literally fuck me sideways.
Randomize
