Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
Threw up 3 times on the lawn mower and then proceeded to crash it into a tree root and break it.
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
I am self-sufficient. I puked in a wine glass and emptied it in the trash. Points for style and neatness
Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.
You fucked him. I baby bird fed him whiskey . I feel like we've bonded.
I have to shower first, I forgot I peed on my feet last night...
I did all i could do but i woke up smelling like cigars and theres salsa all over my face
We are making a pool on how long he stays sober this time you want in?
if i ever get to the point where i am moaning when i pee, please do the honorable thing and kill me.
Never make a coconut bikini from a real coconut.
I smell like old thai food.
Girl behind me in line at CVS was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan B soon she might be a mom and that if we couldn't tell she'd be a horrible mom
I did not shave my legs to sit at home and diddle myself. He better wake the fuck up and put the fear of god in me!
No, I told him I was busy again this weekend. Eventually he’ll learn. Plus, absence makes the cock grow harder
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