you screamed 'he won't go on a date with me, but he gave me a free junior chicken'
well imagine, me dating the manager equals free junior chickens for everyone
Anywhere you can eat green eggs and ham, you can have sex.
IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
at first i was worried but she assured me her frail vegan body would have no chance at conception.
We've done the math and the dogs tails are wagging at a rate of 3000 wags per hour. Stoned.
Was just told that I was slipped 2 hits of acid in my in flight drink before takeoff. 8 hours to Germany wish me luck
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
Never thought going to McDonald's alone at 3 AM would end with a blowjob outside some random girl's apartment...
Just used an eyelash curler to open my beer since I didn't have a bottle opener. Things are starting to look up.
Smoking a bowl and ordering Dominos, you want in on either, both, or none?
Literally I can feel my heart beat in my vagina because of how sore I am
I had a rough night. I'm just gonna lay here and masturbate for a while before I have to go adult.
Let the clothes fall where they may.
Randomize
