is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
WAKE UP. GET ME THE PILL. AND SAVE MY LIFE
just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
I was found on the hood of someone elses car... Who would've thought there were 2 white nissans?
i am breaking up with you. because you wash your hair too much and you only drink light beer and because you're not party enough.
I mean I woke up wearing my bathing suit which blows my mind
Yeah? Well I'm currently predrinking downstairs in my room by myself. Absolut and water with a hint of mint because I'm using the glass I keep my toothbrush in. Fuck, you bitches better get off work soon.
He's afraid of heights. How do I know, you ask? Blowjob on his roof.
Going to a professional golf course at 2am to throw the flag poles like javelins
Someone with the Instagram name "hymenbreaker" just liked a photo of me and my grandma. I feel ashamed.
I was grossed out that all their candles smelled like vagina and then I remembered where my fingers had been.
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
who says I'm not relevant to the kids today? Just had snapchat sex, blows the roof off aim cyber sex
I'm gonna fight the coyote
No i dont need a babysitter i have my cats. Cats can dial 911 ya know
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