I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
Thanks for sticking it out with old horseface last night... I owe you one buddy.
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
The doctor asked me what height I fell from to hurt my back.. I answered keg height
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
Your friends turned off our power in the basement and when we went to turn it back on I got sprayed in the face with a fire extinguisher. FYI.
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
The bald guy bought me a shot so I chugged it and then walked out to the middle of the dance floor and told an old woman that might be your moms twin to bend it over...We didn't end on a good note though. Dude she stepped on my vans.
It's been awhile, you pregnant yet?
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
