Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
i wish mother nature was an actual person cause i'd bitch slap her for sure
He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
I was told to ask you about memoirs of a geisha.
You coming home soon, man?
HENBARSCLOSE
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
I let my cat eat the pepperonis off of my pizza while I was still eating it. That's the level of tequila drunk I got last night.
God I adore you.
I don't know which is worse, the fact that he can say will you fuck me in so many languages or that I'm turned on because of that
I went up by the border of Canada. We took shrooms and went fishing...pretty sure we killed a dragon and ate it for dinner
The thing about being single is like Sunday morning sex is nice but so is Sunday morning eating Nutella from the jar in your underwear
This is my second month of college and all I've learned is how to get a guy to go down on me without asking out loud and not to chase everclear with Smirnoff ice.
Essential life skills
He wanted to save my dignity, I just wanted beads and jäger
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
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