It was all fun and games until Tim shit on the end table
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
my financial goal is to have my cable back before football season starts
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
If he thought that flying across an ocean to visit me in London constituted sex, he thought wrong.
You were in subway at 3am showing everyone your tan lines
if i'm ever face-down on the ground puking again, promise me you won't try to braid my hair?
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
MANGO MOTHERFUCKING GODDAMN MARGARITA DELICIOUSNESS
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
Our apt smells like hot shit marinated in oregano and cumin. No more taco truck dinner, fuck face. The wall paper is peeling.
HELP! How do I get paint off the dog?
my roommate was being a bitch so I changed my Netflix password on her. 21st century slap in the face ladies and gentleman
He let me share his family pack of hot pockets with him. Chivalry isn't dead after all.
Just boned her on my desk. on top of my term paper. take that professor dipshit
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