thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
I'm jealous of your bromance
no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
you know you're a senior when your friends are at the bar before you even get out of class
why the fuck would you go to class? it's karaoke wednesday.
Walk of shaming dressed as a zombie hunter. This hangover feels like the actual apocalypse.
Denis dont give a fuck, Denis drinks out of straws. Denis disregards the fire station & bought 18 fire hoses so he can fight it himself if the farmhouse is on fire.
I started blowing him in North Dakota, and I finished the job in Minnesota. Oh, the places road head can take you.
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
I vaguely remember us chasing shots by licking each other's faces last night. Our friendship has reached another level completely.
Just saw a government minister puke and rally.
They won't let me buy alcohol in the airport until 9am. Super judgemental
So you've been sexting me while spending time with your family
I'm a family man but I have priorities
you said, "I wonder what your mum is doing right now." in the middle of sex, of course I threw up on you.
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
