u cheatin on me?
if i did i would try to upgrade babe.
He just told me his cousin just died and I look like her. Reconsidering the sex.
So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
I'm practically paying him in tacos to have sex with me.
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
I heard him crying and I heard him listening to porn... I'm hoping to God they weren't at the same time.
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
Took three klonopin and turned all my jeans into jorts. I miss you
She said she was hoping I'd be hotter. I told her I didn't see anybody standing in line to titty fuck her either. She was a great kisser.
Right now I'm drinking out of a gallon water jug & eating a baconator. If you're feeling down, just remember you could be me.
Kinda hard to look your partner in the face the day after a rousing game of How Many Ways Can I Capture Your Penis.
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
I need to stop using "I went to the Harry Potter theme park" as my pickup line.
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
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