It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
you always know who the new freshman are on fb because theyre always wearing prom dresses
Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
i was so high it looked like the chipmunks movements were coordinated to that lady gaga song
Something smells like weed and I think it might be my mascara. Come sniff my eyes
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
My therapist is concerned about your alcoholism.
Let's just do a victory lap through all of our exes.
people came up our fire escape and one had a cut on his leg and he was beautiful so i told him i was an emt and bandaged it with princess bandaids
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
Still no second date. Guess you shouldn't show guys your taser on the first date.
That's why my New Years resolution was no more blondes. They're all bad news
We're starting to light shit on fire, bring a metal bucket. Be prepared, Jimmy's off his meds.
The more drunk I get the more I want to steal a lamb
What would be the possible repercussions of lamb theft
Don’t listen to me, I’m walking around wearing nothing but rave bracelets and headphones shouting “yeeeeaaahhhhhhâ€
Randomize