I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
im so drunk with asians
where?
always
sometimes i think what itd be like to be a firework
She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
You were almost as fucked up as I was the night I hooked up with a bob saget look alike...
the parade is in 5 days. put your big boy pants on and come to beer training. time to build your tolerance. i can't have you passing out in a bush with a cape on again this year.
He wrote on the paper that he wanted a "Ptitty burreto" from taco bell...when we ordered it the girl paused and entered "Potatoe burrieto"....we laughed
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
In other news my cocaine dealer got arrested for heaving some kid out of a fourth story window.
I drank beer out of some sort of animal horn all night, then we fucked to a "viking metal" album. I feel like I should go pillage something to complete the Norse trifecta.
I promise that I won't shotgun beers with your boyfriend this time, Scouts Honor.
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
I am mentally ready for anal.
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
Randomize
