You named all of the cocktail shrimps and then tackled a guy for "eating Henry"
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
I've never seen so many strippers at a funeral...
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
what's the name of the guy at the bank you blew to get the lower interest rate?
um. wrong number, but good luck with your loan
It's called "lets see how many European capitals we can do the walk of shame through in one year"
Random question, but did I leave a spoon on your dresser last night?
He talked to you for like two seconds while you were shit faced doing Forest Gump impressions...how is that possible?
My life is over. I farted in open court. Noticeably. The judge looked at me. It echoed.
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
I was not drunk. There was Star Wars, sex, and baby oil.
I don't think you understand I turned down McDonalds for you.
Don't drink and try to take a shower. I thought I was drowning
Does sending her to the conference instead of a competent employee and putting her in a suite make up for banging her husband behind her back?
No, but she’ll have a nice memory when she gets dumped and fired on the same day.
Randomize