brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
I wasn't sure if "you're even prettier in the dark" was a compliment. Hmm.
We just passed a billboard that said to join "jerseydoesntstink.com" and literally 15 seconds later, we could smell jersey.
Sundays should be dedicated to Girl Scout cookies, sex, and super hero movies.
i was enjoying my post acid trip trance a little too much. i found $50 on the sidewalk but didnt pick it up. just stared at the bill cuz it looked cool.
someone picked it up and i stared at the ground where it was for probably another minute or 2
Is it okay to thank someone for the orgasms they gave you, even though they weren't with you?
The cup holder in my recliner holds a whole bottle of wine. That's definitely a sign.
We both shit in the same closet in Santa Fe. Nothing is sacred anymore.
I would just like to say that I was the one who said that we should find scissors, when they were cutting your hair with a kitchen knife. I am responsible.
I still feel bad for it, even though I technically only videotaped it and helped will to distract the questioning neighbor
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
Last night you broke a mirror, and then rolled around in the glass shards. Miraculously, there's not a scratch on you...
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
I just found glitter glue on my jesus bracelet...am I really that gay?
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