I love how understanding people are when they hear we first hooked up getting high and watching nature shows
I love memorial day. It's drinking in the name of patriotism. God Bless America
He just walked in our room casually and said "big girls are hungry"
Oh, I forgot to ask if u have any idea what happened to the back of my ear and if u were present when I almost fell off the roof...
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
Be still, my beating vagina.
I hooked up with a 20 year old last night. I feel like a hocus pocus witch that sucked life from a child.
The things i do for you...I put all those condoms on a bed, complete with girl, and you sleep in the bathroom
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
I have a third degree burn on my inner thigh from the blunt dropping on me in the car
I'm at a new rock bottom. Malibu on ice at work because it's the only thing they've got and no mixers.
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
Ya i'm marrying the man who can hear/smell this level of flatulence and stick around
They don't really make a "hey I'm fucking your ex wife" card do they ?
Randomize
