I'm going to save the lime from my McDonald's salad to use in my Corona later tonight.
We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
I was. I was trying to blow bubbles in the toilet after I threw up in it. They had to carry me everywhere. I lost a sock.
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
I totally just friend requested the girl I met in jail last night so that I could give her back the sunglasses she lent me upon our release. See, I'm not a total delinquent.
I've decided I'm going to drink again. More. Day drinking. Night drinking. Everything. It's the responsible thing to do since I'm not pregnant
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
God if that man would just have sex with me every time I got mad life would be so much easier...
Last night was like blooper reel sex. He dropped me!!
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
I need a fucking roommate.
You need a fucking babysitter.
holy f. i broke my toe giving him head. how does that even happen!?
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