so explain again why im purple
no
I accidentally threw away from slim jim and some lady saw me dig it out of the garbage. It was unopened but still, I look so homeless.
you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
So my mom wants me to come swim with dolphins with my little sisters in October. I'm not sure how to tell her I saw a "when dolphins attack" special when I was rolling and am now terrified of them.
My cat was watching porn with me. Weirdest bonding experience ever.
I feel like an elephant shit on me and left me to be miserable
Yeah, first date. First take a pic of him to circulate around for your friends and than have him fill out a short penis questionnaire. Seems completely legit to me.
She was dressed as a banana and told me that I needed more potassium in my diet. Of course I went down on her.
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
I'm a fuck boy trapped in a single mom's body.
im about to bake her parents a "thank you for making such beautiful babies, ive had sex with all 5 of them" cake
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
Randomize
