dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
His dick was so small it sat perched on top of his balls like it was king of his scrotum.
the non-midget kid sent 8,000 texts in a month. the midget parents are pissed. THIS IS EPIC WHEN YOUR HIGH.
pop tarts are not kleenex
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
Woke up with my foot jammed into a VCR
Thats why you always identify the subtext of a blowjob before you accept it.
They were taking shots out of the caps of perfume bottles. This is too much for me.
I told him he was a man of science and that he should conduct experiments on my tits to see how they stay up. I need you to hold onto my larynx when I'm drunk.
I found your Halloween costume. I think you shit yourself last night
The guy at the bar repeatedly told us he was an off duty cop from out of town, that to normal people would be the time where you stop asking him to smoke a blunt with us
Tim and I found you a 5ish and asked how you were doing with the breakup. All you said was "i can't words"
To be fair I went my whole first week without showing up to work drunk!
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
Randomize