Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
yo im tryna cop a beej tonight
obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
this boner is exhausting
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
i just saw the eighteen different ways i could die and only after that did i realize i'd made a poor decision
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
Also got home. Still stoned. Mom was up. We made a pizza and were writing a children's book. Sleep good.
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
The universe is cradling this hangover like a gay couple cradles their newly adopted chinese baby.
I consider any night I don't make out with someone a bad night. So I've been great.
He compared my blow job skills to finding gold treasure in a gold chest, so there's that.
The stripper was dressed as the green lantern. Even for a geeky girls' bachelorette party it was lame ass.
Cause I know you wanna ride the D like a Vespa in ROMAN HOLIDAY
Is it okay to get drunk at a baby shower? ....asking for a friend
Randomize
