he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
The waiter to-go cupped my bloody mary without me even asking. THAT hungover.
Either this is the best sandwich I've ever had, or my stomach is just relieved to have something in it that's not Red Bull or semen.
You've been drinking wine and eating bacon all afternoon. HOW IS THAT DOING GOOD?!?!
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it.
So. How about you can get tequila certified...
I'm ready to get married, then we can lie around watching anime and eating pizza while he rubs baby oil on me
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
Once again being low on toilet paper is forcing us into another round of our favorite game - toilet paper roulette - where there can only be 1 winner. Maybe.
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
Do you think if I had a tempurpedic bed he would still be able to feel me fingering myself after we have sex?
Can I come over and get it in, take a nap in ur bed, grab some poptarts and then leave?
You haven't lost that air of class about you...
Randomize