Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
your address is 607B right?
yeah why?
i need to tell the guy bringing over the flaming bag of dog shit where to put it
Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
I just discovered how perfect a shot glass is for putting your chicken nugget dipping sauces into. Like I'll probably do this when I'm a mother feeding my children.
Dude dan is so baked he taped his remote to the futon so he couldn't lose it again. Come over here
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
Saw a guy throw up on himself while walking, drinking, and singing all at the same time. Hope your night is going better than his :)
Tonight was the second time that I've pretended like English was my 2nd language to avoid conversation w a creeper.
I BIT YOU IN THE DINING ROOM. I bit you and you crunched
If I win the contest of drinking the most water I get a chicken nugget.
Just found my glass of wine on top of the litter box. Every argument ever is invalid.
I'm dressed as a caveman and drunk so that's not really an option
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
Cocaine is ok on a cleanse, right?
Randomize