Talking to this girl is like playing minesweeper on hard. There's red flags everywhere.
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
Did you know the Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders have an exercise show ON Demand? Yeah, I had a lonely night
i've never smoked before...when you said wake and bake i thought you meant like a funeral bbq or something
I caught him trying to shit in her bed. I asked him why he was doing it and he said "because it's wrong."
I put you to bed and you would not go unless I let you sleep with the vodka
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO GET MY FUCKING CUPCAKES WHEN THE GROUNDSWORKER I HOOKED UP WITH IS LOITERING IN THE VENDING AREA
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
There is a video on my phone of me suckling a bag of wine from your crotch area while you say "The Body of Christ" in a Michigan accent. I vaguely remember being offended by this yet I did it anyway.
The first thing I did when I got to the apartment was masturbate on the couch
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
I either have food poisoning or I'm pregnant. Either way, I NEED JESUS!
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Double high-fived his wife and her sister on the way out. If I'm not the best mistress ever tell me how.
Randomize
