We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
i got lost in a forest last night. this morning I realized the "forest" was just 6 trees on campus.
If we're like this now and women reach their sexual peak in their 30's, I can't even fathom what our futures hold.
Fell off bed. Face first. 10 stitches. huge scar on forehead. totally going to start telling ppl my parents died fighting Voldemort.
It's going to be great. We're a perfect team to break up marriages and happiness.
After doing lines off my chest, she said, "do you even know how fast I could suck your cock right now?!!" and her friend said, "yea she totally could".
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
She's like a connoisseur of porn. Her collection has things in it I never even knew existed. She even has an Italian batman porno. Where has she been all my life?
We ended up debating which Food Network host would do best in porn.
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
Terrible hangover + phoenix airport + pizza hut....I think I might have entered one of the levels of hell.
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
I opened a bud lite with a fencing sword last night. Yeah you banged that guy.
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
I just slept for fifteen hours straight. It's like my body knows i'm drinking with you and is preparing..
Randomize