Pretty sure somebody just said 'I used to have a nipple'
that's awkward
what if every blade of grass was a penis?
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
No, I don't not want an upside down piggyback ride. You're drunk and there are rocks.
You need an intervention. You fell into traffic walking home.
Not really. Birthday weekend. Totally jusifiable. Besides I didn't get hit. No harm no foul.
She was covered in mud grabbed my crotch and said see that handprint that means I called dibs
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
He just subscribed to one of my Spotify playlists. The next step is sex.
I feel like captain Morgan put his peg leg up my ass
Positive reinforcement! I'm training him for being a good boy and coming over. He gets sex and cookies.
Are we going to go home and do it or do I have time to eat my nachos bell grande first?
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
Today, this cop risk his life to save me from a sink hole but all I could do is laugh, I was so stoned
Randomize
